Loss and Bliss

last night I lost my first patient 

it was also my:

first code 

first time doing CPR 

first time pushing code medications 

first time oxygenating a patient by bagging

but mostly, 

it was my first loss 

my co-workers were concerned for me 

but I was ok

I was at peace with the situation

last night totally confirmed that I am where I need to be 

I was born to be an emergency nurse 

and couldn't be happier about it 

I absolutely love my job and not many people can say that 

today I am blissfully happy 

because we are exactly one month from our wedding date 

the time has seriously flown 

we have a few things left to tie up and plan 

but mostly just payments to be made 

it feels good to be so close 

and surprisingly I am not as stressed as I thought I would be 

I have my dress and we have our rings 

really just the vows are left to nailed down

everything else is just details 

I can't wait to be Mrs. Rice forever :)