Monday, May 20, 2013


Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now. 

Jared left this morning. 
He is gone to Milwaukee on a business trip
At 3:30am he kissed me goodbye and headed for the airport
I will not see him until Matt and Kelly's rehearsal dinner Friday night,
(yay for our sweet friends finally tying the knot!!)
which is also our five year anniversary together (what the what!?)

We will be apart for 112 long hours. 
People may think this is "dramatic" that this is my current "struggle"
But in all honesty we spend very little time apart from each other
And I like it that way. 

circa december 2008
that time Jared surprised me with his new "haircut"
and that I thought it was cool to part my hair entirely too far over...
even then we were inseparable. 

It isn't just the being apart part that is my struggle
It's the fact that my anxiety sky rockets when he isn't here.

Early in this challenge we had to talk about fears which I discussed here
Basically I freak about, well, everything. 
I have anxiety about everything. 
Especially when left to my own devices...

So really I am struggling with not only being away from my future hubs 
aka protector of all things scary and my life saver 
but the fact that every noise in this house scares me...
Beau is comforting, but won't beat down an intruder (lick to death, yes)...
we live in a not so safe neighborhood...
my car is sketch and likes to not work when I most need it...

 I am struggling with my anxiety. 
It could get its own chapter in my life
because it sucks and takes over my psyche.

hurry up Friday

Good thing I am marrying the man who keeps me clam and somewhat sane. 
Phew, deep breath. 
I will survive this week and Jared will travel safely home to me
and whatever the future holds (travel or not) we will survive.

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